Tuesday, March 4, 2014
"The LORD has been my stronghold, And my God the rock of my refuge."
Psalm 94:22
Just over two years ago I wrote a blog, "Cancer", which gave an introduction to my family's journey through the diagnosis of cancer to my dad. I've thought many times of posting an update throughout this journey, but felt as though dad covered it well on his Caring Bridge. Today, though, was different. Today, we all experienced a new part of this journey from our own perspectives. Today, we all took a step out, knowing the suffering that it would cause. Today, we met with the doctor, nurse and cancer care coordinator that have been taking such great care of my dad. Today we talked about "what's next".
There is not much that can be said or done to prepare for this day. Emotions ran high: before, during and after. Everything was put out on the table.
Talking about death was no longer avoided.
The past two years have been a roller coaster of ups and downs; good days and bad days; laughter and tears. But what has never ceased to amaze me is God's Love for our family. The way he has provided is far more than any of us could ever expect. He has provided financially, through gifts, meals, and gas cards. He has provided physically, through the Gorecki Guest House and the Ronald McDonald House. He has provided emotionally, through surrounding us with family, friends and strangers who have lifted us up in prayer, sat in the waiting room during surgeries, and sent letters, e-mails or have called. He has provided for us spiritually, through His Word. His written love letter to those who call upon Him, to those whom He loves, and to those who need to know they are intimately loved by a great and mighty God. A God who promises to never leave them nor forsake them.
Leaving the cancer center today with my family and heading towards my home tonight, I was in tears. Yes, for the obvious reasons, but the thing that stood above all of those was that God is SO good. His peace was overwhelming today, and has been since day one of this journey. I am in awe of my Creator because of not only what He has done for me, but that He cares so deeply - about me, about my family, about my dad - that He would send His Son, to die the death of a sinner, even though he had no sin, to take my sin away; to release me from the chains of that sin. To release my dad and my family from the chains of this cancer. We are free in Christ. Dad is free in Christ. And there is no greater comfort than that.
I have NOT given up hope on what God is doing in my dad's life. And dad is by no means ready to give up the fight, either, as he gets stronger each day. I do believe that He can work a miracle and rid my dad's body of cancer. But I also know that if He so chooses not to, I have a Rock within my Refuge that will stand strong for me, for my family. I have a God that has a bigger plan beyond the small lens I look through.
I know that my life has been forever changed because of cancer. Maybe you have a story, too. Be it yourself or someone in your life. One of the best things you can do, as we have learned through our journey, is to share your story! You never know who else may be struggling, or even who else may be having some early cancer symptoms and may get checked out because of your story (this has happened multiple times with my dad's story). I invite you to share your story in the comments below, or send me an e-mail (jorrock8@gmail.com). I'd love to hear your story, and pray for you, as countless people have been doing for us.
Jenna's Journal
